HIGH then LOW

HIGH...

A.M. 

Was out for little hike with little brother and feeling good. Was hurting and tired but felt good to talk and get some fresh air.

NOON

Headed back home and took some photos of different fungus and mushrooms. Then home again. Little later it was not so good.

Had a fire going and was so angry I wanted to throw myself on it. Everything was making me mad. I was pacing and crying. Hurting and tired too.

Why can't I be like everyone else in my family?

Going to bed now I hope to sleep.

Heather Cole

FEELING BLAH

Felling Blah

Haven't posted in few days been feeling really down. Want to drink, want to get high, want to run. No I haven't drank, done drugs or ran yet. I have worked everyday this week and exhausted. I have cried everyday this week at least twice a day. Feeling alone and just sick. Then to hear someone say I am just faking mental illness so I don't have to take care of my responsibilities really ticks me off. Really wish they could live in my head for a day even. The voices have started being mean again and won't shut the hell up. I work and then come home. I don't go out anymore. I don't hang with friends. And I don't want to be.  That is all for today.

Heather Cole 

JUST THINKING

Just Thinking

What makes us think?

Why do people drink?

How much time is left for us?

Why do people want love?

How did the kiss get started?

What if the world just stop spinning?

What is the meaning of life?

What if the moon disappeared?

Or the reason why some people are lost?

Do they know where they are?

Then are they really lost at all?

Is fake really real?

Why are women pictured in dresses?

Why do some crave chaos and clutter?

How do two people make it work?

Why do we pray?

Why are most buildings shaped the same way?

Why do you see just one shoe along the highway?

Why one and not two?

Why am I wired different than others?

Why do some people kill others?

Why do some kill themselves?

Just thoughts that go through my mind... constantly worried about things and can't shut it off.

Written By: Heather Cole

                    4/3/2018